Volume 3, Issue 6, June/July 2024
Welcome to Volume 3, Issue 6 of The Root.
In order to support our growth, we require a strong network of roots. They anchor us and serve as a conduit for nutrients to help us develop and deliver on our goals.
I’m always learning new concepts in leadership for myself and my clients.
A theme that keeps resonating for me this month is Courage. I see it in the women and men around me trying new things. New businesses, new challenges and new transitions. They aren’t taking it easy. They aren’t staying in their comfort zone. They are moving toward a bit of discomfort.
Courageously.
Thank you for following along our journey to Aspire to Grow.
Off the Shelf – My Book Pick
The Gifts of Imperfection: Let Go of Who You Think You’re Supposed to Be and Embrace Who You Are
In this book The Gifts of Imperfection, Dr. Brené Brown revisits this book upon it’s 10th year anniversary. I have the anniversary edition, and didn’t even realize the subtitle: Let Go of Who You Think You’re Supposed to Be and Embrace Who You Are.
Wow – did I need this book right now. Mic drop. 🎤
Whole-Hearted Living (WHL)
As you know, Brené is the queen of shame and vulnerability research. She believes in living a Whole-Hearted Life. One filled with purpose, authenticity and connection. She’s the first one to share her own journey. As the intro to this anniversary issue, she says since she initially wrote The Gifts of Imperfection, it’s been “an amazing, hard-as-shit, beautiful 13 years”.
I love her realness 🙂 WHL is the way we want to show up in our lives. To embody WHL, we need to live with Courage, Compassion and Connection in order to feel the love, belonging and authenticity that means so much to those of you who may still be reading this blog.
The idea behind leading a Whole-Hearted Life?
- Live the life you want to live vs. the life you are “supposed to” live
- Worrying more about how I feel vs. “what people think of us”
She “believe[s] everyone deserves brave and safe spaces to be vulnerable”. This can be your space.
Courage, Compassion and Connection
The 3 Cs. Let’s break them down.
Courage
By definition, courage requires us to be vulnerable to lean into our bravery. It’s our willingness to let go of what others think of us, our decisions, and our choices. And it’s hard to do.
I like to think that courage is also the vulnerability to be unique and to be among the few that may go against the grain. It can be uncomfortable, and many times you are left wondering if this is how courage is supposed to feel.
We can’t be courageous without “couraging” – it requires the DIG deep method:
- Deliberate
- Inspired
- Get Going
We have to be firm in our belief and behaviors (Deliberate), enough to Inspire us to Get Going (take action).
What is your inspiration?
And what is your Action?
Compassion
The other C for Whole Hearted Living is Compassion.
- For Ourselves
- For Others
We need to stand up to our thoughts of not being “good enough” or not being worthy. So many of these “unworthiness” thoughts originate from shame or fear — both of those are super powerful. And, we need to allow ourselves and others the grace to move gently toward Courage and Whole-Hearted Living.
It’s heavy work, with lots of rewiring of old hardened messages and behaviors. It’s also great advice for us as parents, coaches, advisors, founders and friends.
How are you being gentle with yourself and others?
Connection
The final C is Connection.
She defines this as the “energy that exists between people who feel seen, heard and valued”. Such a powerful and visceral definition of Connection.
It’s no doubt that true connection helps us grow emotionally, spiritually, physically and intellectually. There is so much good with this book that I have not even come close to touching upon – please check it out! The 10 guideposts to Whole Hearted Living are great reminders.
My Article Pick
HBR – Choose Courage Over Confidence by Christie Hunter Arscott
In the article from December 2022, Christie Hunter Arscott share wisdom on why to Choose Courage Over Confidence.
What drew me to this article was the idea of choice.
We can actually make this choice for ourselves, even when we feel paralyzed by fear.
She questioned women from across the globe, and to the question:
“If you’ve ever avoided risks, what factors and reasons contributed to this?”
- >70% reported self-doubt in their skills and capabilities
- This self-doubt is more common in women professionals (more than their male counterparts)
Courage
So, if we lack the confidence that most men have, we must choose courage.
High-achieving women were found to have a built in coping mechanism against this self-doubt.
What is the coping mechanism?
You guessed it – COURAGE.
And when we jump into scary, unknown roles or assignments, the courage allows us to build the confidence we need. Hunter Arscott says we can reframe our lack of confidence into courage more readily.
Here are her 3 strategies:
- Take Small steps or Micro Acts of Courage
- These unlock the “courageous mindset”
- Pushing just a bit further each day past discomfort
- Practice Courage in all Aspects of Your Life
- Start outside of work to build the courage muscle
- Setting boundaries (saying No)Trying new things
- Try Again Tomorrow
- Don’t give up, even when things get tough
- Don’t give up, even when things get tough
What steps toward courage can you take this week?
Stream On – My Podcast Pick
Wiser Than Me – with Julia Louis-Dreyfus
I won’t share a specific episode (there are so many), but in this series of interviews, Julia L-D interviews women +65 years of age. They share their wisdom, their lived experiences, and their difficulties, including women like Jane Fonda, author Isabel Allende, Carol Burnett, Gina McCarthy (maybe my fav), and more! Embrace more courage as these women who are Wiser Than Me (and most of us!)
Continue to do great things 🌿Thank you
My hope with this issue was to inspire you to move toward more courageous action, knowing that you aren’t alone on this journey.
Keep Going,~Kathleen