Volume 3, Issue 9, October/November 2024
Welcome to Volume 3, Issue 9 of The Root.
In order to support our growth, we require a strong network of roots. They anchor us and serve as a conduit for nutrients to help us develop and deliver on our goals.
This month, during this time of intensity, I wanted to dive back into the topic of Trust.
I see myself as a trusted individual, with integrity as a core value. But, I also don’t want to take for granted that I also need to help others find trust in me.
So, I wanted to review the key elements of trust.
It’s always a good reminder, especially this time of this year.
Thank you for following along our journey to Aspire to Grow.
Check us out at www.aspiretogrow.co <the .com domain was taken, but I like to think of it as “.co” for co-create>.
Off the Shelf – My Book Pick
The Trusted Advisor by David H. Maister, Charles H. Green & Robert M. Galford
Of the great books I’ve read, many were assigned reading as part of my graduate study in Organizational Learning and Change Management. So many of them truly resonated with my core, it led me to change my career trajectory.
The Trusted Advisor is one of those key books. Maister, et al, help to clarify that the key to great business is great and trusted relationships. Especially, as it relates to 1:1 coaching and consulting. Yet, at the time of my class, I found that so many of these elements were crucial to my leadership and team building, as well as stakeholder management, too.
The Sweet Spot
The “sweet spot” for becoming a trusted advisor/coach/colleague is at the overlap of:
- Earning trust
- Building relationships
- Giving advice/coaching effectively
The key here is building that ability, in the moment, to focus on the other person.
How frequently do we get caught up in telling and not asking?
Stay curious. Ask questions.
The Trust Equation
Perhaps it’s the math lover in me that made this equation so impactful.
Why it Matters
The trust equation was an enlightenment moment for me. Maister, Green and Galford break down Trustworthiness into the 4 essential components:
- Credibility (the words you use)
- Reliability (your actions)
- Intimacy (the emotional connection)
- Self-orientation (your motive)
For me, the idea in this relationship that motive is the denominator speaks volumes.
- Have you ever known someone whose self-orientation is off the charts? (either explicitly or implicitly?)
- How did that make you feel?
- Did you have immediate trust?
Once that trust is either lost, or not quite formed, it’s a long battle to get it or earn it.
The Path to Developing Trust
Lastly, Maister, Green and Galford remind us of the important sequential pathway to build rapport and trust.
- Engage
- Listen (actively)
- Frame (restate the root issue)
- Envision (help to create a future focus)
- Commit (help your client/peer/employee take action)
Even in normal conversations and important dialogue, mapping out these steps can be a game changer. This ensures you have adequately assessed all steps.
Especially when the stakes are high!
I hope you will look into their website or the great book — it’s my go to! 🌿❤️📗
Stream On – My Podcast Pick
HBR: Women at Work The Essentials: Building and Repairing Trust
This podcast episode is part of the Women in Work series. Much of this advice is also true for men.
In this episode, the hosts speak with Ruchi Sinha, who is an organizational behavior specialist, who has written the HBR article, New to the Team? Here’s How to Build Trust (Remotely).
The episode provides an overview of her article and suggestions. It includes real life examples and feedback. I found it useful to listen while I’m driving.
Three Qualities of Trust
Dr. Sinha mentions there are three qualities of trust:
- Competence (reliability and successful)
- Benevolence (having well-meaning, other- oriented, compassionate)
- Integrity (honesty and ethical)
These elements help to build those trusting relationships we all need to complete complex organizational tasks in a very fast moving space.
The episode also talks to how we must gain trust, even when we are not able to share the full story (such as related to business change or transformation). Dr. Sinha says, in times of change, benevolence and integrity are the utmost importance to maintain. If impressions of either of those change (if delivering on a project goes awry), it is much harder to repair, despite your best intentions.
Part of that means owning your part in any competency delivery issues. As you can see, these key elements are not so different than the trust equation above.
What steps can you take to cultivate genuine goodwill and show your unwavering integrity in an authentic way with your leaders, peers, employees and stakeholders?
As women leaders, we know that likeability (benevolence) is a big factor in building trust.
We can’t just come at a problem with competence and earn trust.
This was a great reminder.
And just remember, none of us are perfect, especially as it comes to the pace of change and project delivery.
Reflect, assess and address for future encounters. 🌿❤
Self-Discovery Self-Guided Experience
Whether you’re interested in private coaching or reflecting with a group of supportive peers, the self-awareness begins with:
- Understanding your unique strengths
- Clarifying your core values
- Aligning your priorities
We will uncover a path that creates self-awareness that is truly authentic with who you are.
Choose your preferred way to explore:
- Private 1:1 guidance
- Shared wisdom in community.
Mindful Moments
A Guided meditation for Exploring Your Habitual Reactions by Patricia Rockman
Especially, this time of year.
- Annual budgets.
- Annual performance management requirements.
- Elections.
It’s a lot.
Take a moment (12 minutes to be exact) to build into your schedule for a brief meditation to shift and calm your mind.
Thank you for reading, and please take care.
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